Life Lessons from an old Photographer...

You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.          ~Steve Jobs 

Last night, as I often do, I turned to PBS to see what was on. I love PBS dramas, news programs, and documentaries. Last night there was a documentary on someone I'd never heard of... though I certainly should have. The program was called "Eye on the Sixties" and was about a photographer by the name of Rowland Scherman.



If you are like me, and have never heard of him, I am certain you have seen his work. Mr. Scherman was literally everywhere in the 1960's taking photographs. He was a bit of a Forrest Gump kind of guy, showing up uninvited at some of the most important events of this momentous decade. He took photos at the Newport Music Festival in 1962, which was Bob Dylan's debut. Joan Baez and Peter, Paul and Mary were also there. He heard President Kennedy's speech about the Peace Corps and presented himself to the Washington DC office, only a few desks and very few people at the time, and volunteered to be their photographer. That idea took some selling to the new Director of the Peace Corps, Sargeant Shriver (who happened to be President Kennedy's brother-in-law...) but eventually Mr. Scherman was sent out all over the world to photograph Peace Corps workers. His photos were used to promote the program and help make it the success it has been. It also connected him to the Kennedy family. He took photos of JFK, was invited by Eunice Shriver (President Kennedy's sister) to take photos of an event at her home  that was the founding of Special Olympics, and that led to Mrs. Shriver recommending him to her brother Bobby Kennedy to take a family photo  for the RFK family Christmas card.  Later, when Bobby Kennedy ran for President, it helped Mr. Scherman become the campaign photographer.

Mr. Scherman also had a knack for putting himself in the right place at the right time. He was one of the first to arrive at Woodstock. He was one of the first to arrive in Washington, CD for the March On Washington in 1963 (the event where Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his "I have a dream" speech...) The documentary describes him as "a charming guy" and he used that to open doors for himself. It helped him get up close to the stage at a Beatles concert in 1963. It led him to photograph Judy Collins and Joni Mitchell and to be present in the recording studio for the Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young debut album (one of my all time favorites...) He finessed himself backstage to get a photo of Bob Dylan at a concert that he sold to Capital Records-- and they put it on Dylan's "Greatest Hits" album cover. That album cover won a Grammy award in 1968.

There will be those who read this that won't know who some of the people are I have mentioned. The 1960's were a long time ago... long enough now that a lot of the details of people and events have faded. I wish I could show some of his photographs here, but alas, they are copyrighted.  I would invite you to look up Mr. Scherman online,  go to his own web site (http://www.rowlandscherman.com/) or to watch the documentary-- his story is fascinating!

What prompted me to think so much about this guy is not that he had met so many famous people or been present at so many historical moments. It was that he made it all happen for himself. He made sure doors opened to him. He made his own destiny, if you will. This guy was gregarious, charming, and genuinely liked people. He had a way of making people comfortable in his presence. And that allowed him to capture some very famous people at unguarded moments, when their inner self could shine.

The photos are amazing, but the story of the man who took them is equally amazing. I learned, I guess, that if someone has talent and believes in him/herself, they must not be afraid to open their own doors. Success requires creative planning sometimes. It requires an awareness of time and place and what should work in that setting. It requires not just a little BS... (or perhaps, a nicer term is "finesse".)

This is my message to my children and grandchildren:  Make your own success. Discover what you love to do and then go make your life happen so you can do that. Mr. Scherman is 76 years old and is still out there shooting photographs, meeting people, recording history in innovative ways. He says in the documentary that he still loves taking photographs. It doesn't feel like work to him-- it is pure joy. That's what I want my children and grandchildren to hear-- if you can do something you love, it won't feel like work. It will bring joy to your life and you will be successful.

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.          ~Confucious                                 

Battling Extremism

                                

                                   


Extremism is so easy. You've got your position, and that's it. It doesn't take much thought. And when you go far enough to the right you meet the same idiots coming around from the left.
(Interview, Time Magazine, February 20, 2005)
          ~ Clint Eastwood

About once a week I drive the 45 minute route to visit my mom. She and I usually go out to lunch, and then we run her errands-- a few items from the grocery, or the drugstore, or a visit to the eyeglass store, stuff like that. This week she and I had a delightful lunch followed by a fun trip to her local mall to return some slacks she realized were the wrong color. We returned the slacks without difficulty, and had some extra time so we did a little window shopping at the newly installed Christmas displays inside the store. I always enjoy looking at the formal dresses -- and there were some really pretty ones shown. My mother and I giggled at the extreme high-heeled shoes, both of us now past the age when fashion in footwear is more important than comfort. She wondered if there were any purses on sale, so off we headed to the handbag department. I love this area-- the smell of leather and the smooth, handsome bags (all at prices now out of my retirement income reach...) are fun to look at. We were greeted as we entered the department by a very nice younger woman who was dressed very conservatively and spoke with a heavy accent I couldn't identify. She showed my mother the purses that were for sale, and then stopped to chat with me while Mom shopped. "Is this lovely lady your mother?" she asked. When I told her yes, she said, "Oh enjoy her company! I wish so much I could spend time with my mother, but she is 8000 miles away..." That comment seemed to demand a response, so I asked her, "Where is your mother?" and I was told "Iran..." I asked her if that was where she was from, and she said yes somewhat timidly. I wondered if she expected me to react negatively, given the friction now between our two countries. I only commented that "Wow... that is indeed a long way away to be from your mother!"

I thought about that saleswoman later. I don't know much about Iran, but I do know it has been ruled by Muslim extremists, and that women there tend to follow the extremist teachings of their faith. That is, they must cover their heads in public, are not allowed in public without their husband or father, are not allowed to be as educated as males. The woman I encountered spoke perfect English, did not have her head covered, and was working outside the home without a husband or father in attendance. I wondered how she got here, and whether the freedom she was experiencing from the extreme tenets of her faith were worth the separation from a much-beloved mother.

I was reminded of a patient I had cared for in an OB department long ago. She was surrounded by her mother and sisters, as she labored to delivery a baby. Her husband was there but was not participating in the birth of his child much-- just checking in to see how things were progressing now and then. The patient and the attentive women of her family spoke in hushed terms about the man, and about how the new baby would "bring him around". I learned over time that the marriage was breaking apart and that he had been seeing other women, and had been verbally and emotionally abusive to his wife. The family were all fundamentalist Christians-- the women dressed in skirts only (no pants allowed...), forbid the cutting of a woman's hair (which resulted in some elaborate hairdos!) and did not work outside the home. This woman was greatly troubled by her husband's behavior, and was reaching out to her family, her pastor, and even to me, for advice on how to fix it. Her family and her pastor all told her to pray harder, be a more submissive wife, bow to her husband's will in all things. I told her that there were options available to her besides submission and prayer, and if she wanted to hear about them I'd get the social worker to come in to discuss. As a young woman myself at the time, I couldn't imagine anyone sticking around in such a setting to raise a baby, and was heart broken when the patient did not wish to speak with the social worker and took her new baby home, with plans to be even more submissive, and probably even more miserable, than ever. 

Often, any discussion of religion meanders into the realm of politics too. It would seem that politics can have a similar effect on women-- influencing their personal, work day and social/political lives in so many ways. A hundred years ago women wanted to vote, and that was seen as extremist by some. Today, equal pay for equal work is seen by some as just as extreme. The ability to be just as educated, to choose a profession based on ability and desire alone, to own property, to live and work independently-- all are positions that at some point were seen as extreme-- or maybe still are. 

I do not wish to discuss religion or politics here... they are very private matters that each individual must ponder on their own, and seek out the company of like-minded people to share with. But I will say that extremism does not exist only in foreign countries-- it is here too. How a non-extremist deals with this can be delicate-- particularly in a country that has as one of it's tenets a strong belief in the separation of church and state. Where is the line between "fundamentalism" and "extremism", where does religion stop and cultism begin? And why, oh why do so many religions and political viewpoints focus on forcing women to be submissive or second rate citizens? 

I don't have any answers-- but I have a few guidelines I follow:
     1.  If your religion or politics require women to behave differently than men, beware. Are you being told you must not work outside the home? Or that equal pay for equal work is "bad for jobs"? Must you dress in a particular fashion?
     2.  If your religion or politics seems overly interested in your private life-- such as whether and how you access birth control, beware.
     3.  If your religion or politics does not encourage you to THINK and ASK QUESTIONS about important issues, if you are told to just accept the teachings of your faith or your political leaders, BEWARE!

Perhaps that last one is the answer after all... Women must be allowed to investigate, to think and ask questions, to seek out answers, to form their own opinions. Any religion or political system that encourages that is worth considering. Don't be afraid of new knowledge-- seek it out and embrace it. (Let's face it-- if you are reading this online, you already have at your disposal the ability to access almost all of the knowledge human beings have collected-- without going outside the door of your home!) Don't follow the old "Don't confuse me with facts!" attitudes that seem to pervade our culture-- it is what leads to extremists controlling us. Question everything. Keep your mind open to the opinions of others, and try to really listen to them. 

Our country's politics seems gridlocked with opposing sides both refusing to consider the opinions and ideas of the other side. Extremism appears just around the corner. It seems that perhaps women hold the key-- let us enter the debate, let us investigate, consider, discuss. Let us be fully human, and perhaps then we can begin to solve issues and bring people together.